ARCHGOAT - Heavenly Vulva (Christ's Last Rites) MCD
Debemur Morti Productions
Genre: Black Metal
For those of you who don't know about ARCHGOAT (yeah there might be one or two) I'll explain. In my not so humble opinion they are one of a handful of Finnish acts who over the last five years have resurrected that nation's representation in the world of Black Metal. They were originally a second wave era band, starting out in the early nineties and following in the hoove steps of fellow Finns BEHERIT. But by the middle of that decade they pulled the horns down and replaced it by giving a middle finger salute to the whole Black Metal scene. They didn't care for the way the scene had become commercialized or for a more familiar term "FALSE". Then in the middle 2000s they returned with a vengeance releasing some of their most fiercest material as in the Whore of Bethlehem full length from 2006 and the essential from 2009 The Light Devouring Darkness. They also put out a few shorter version releases, an EP and a split release, plus the two disc compilation from last year, The Aeon of the Angelslaying Darkness.
So here we have their latest for this decade which is basically five new songs and an intro all lasting a mere sixteen minutes. Now for anyone new to ARCHGOAT I'd say Heavenly Vulva is worth it's weight in ah, heavenly vulvas. Yeah I bet that mental picture made you sick. As for long time fans well it's better to have then to dismiss outright. You can never have enough raw necro blackened Finnish filth. Once you get past the worthless intro it's like welcoming home an old friend. The title track actually starts this ritual off with a doom laden slow groove that guitarist Ritual Butcher sinks his teeth into in order to produce a life sucking riff. Lord Angelslayer (vox/bass) plucks a heavy yet simple bass line as he croaks out the lyrics. Yes in the past you've seen me use the term 'satanic frog vocals'. Well Lord Angelslayer takes that to an even lower degree as if he coated his larynx in tar prior to the recording. Listening to this title cut is like riding a carousel with it's repetitive groove continuously tracking. You're perched upon a horse laying into an angel's behind while demons surround the perimeter spitting hot saliva upon you. The next cut, "Penetrator of the Second Temple", is where ARCHGOAT's patented blackened death grind style kicks in with punishing results. Although not as hateful as their older pursuits this runs at a few seconds over three minutes with a few take a breather breakdowns to stretch it out.
The release's mid-point cut, "Goddess of the Abyss of Graves", starts off with a woman moaning in sexual delight until the 30 second mark then is replaced with what I'd say sounds like a goat braying in orgasm. Expect nothing but total no class filth from ARCHGOAT. Once the song commences it's more hateful blackened death grind exactly like the earlier cut. That bleeds into "Day of Clouds" as if it simply was a continuation of the previous cut. If I was gonna shave points off of this EP it would be the band's obvious going through the motions style throughout it's length. The final song, "Passage to Millennial Darkness", is simply a continuation of the same thick filthy riffs and blast-beating. Look here I'm not trying to come off like a pretentious egocentric indie rock loser masque raiding as an extreme metal fan. When it comes to ARCHGOAT you pretty much know what to expect but in all honesty with the exception of the intro and title cut, the rest of this could just as well been one long multi-part song. I'm a fan but an honest one. I'd beware of any scribe who states that this goes beyond their previous audio hatred. To me this is almost a rehearsal for hopefully a future total hatefuck. For now this is okay and I'll look forward to something next year.